Stunned Silent
by Roxal
Summary: You asked me what was wrong. Why I've been acting strange lately. It's because I love you, Sora. Warnings: Language. Status: Oneshot. [Onesided RikuSora]


"I love you."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I love you."  
  
"Riku, this isn't funny." Sora took a cautious step backward.  
  
"It's not supposed to be." Riku stepped forward, closing the gap once again.  
  
"Wh-What are you talking about, you 'love me'?" Sora asked in utter confusion now mixed with fear.  
  
"You asked me what was wrong; why I've been acting strange lately. It's because I love you, Sora. It's hard to be around you now, knowing that I can't have you." Riku then smirked, brushing his fingertips against the side of the younger boy's face. "Can I?" He asked seductively.  
  
Sora blushed, once again withdrawing in confusion and panic. "NO! No, you can't 'have' me! Riku, what the hell's the matter with you? You're scaring me. You really are." His expression changed from fear to worry. "Please, stop it."  
  
Riku withdrew his hand, letting it fall limply to his side. He looked into Sora's eyes, searching the puzzled gaze, then looked away. "Fine." He paused, then, "I'm sorry, Sora. I won't bother you anymore." He turned around and began walking away.  
  
"No, wait, Riku, that's not what I meant!" Sora called in vain, as Riku broke into a run. Sora was about to follow him, but thought it best not to bother the older boy when he was distressed. Instead, he slumped down on the dock, pulling his knees to his chest and staring into the ocean. "Great. My best /male/ friend s in love with me. Fucking Fantastic." He grumbled, clenching his hands into fists.  
  
"Of all the fucked up shit in the world... We just got back a year ago. We've already been through so much, and now he - he /loves/ me? Oh, Jesus Christ." He grabbed a handful of hair and tugged. "Why didn't I see it before? How come it has to be this way? Now I've offended him and /I/ feel guilty when /he's/ the one who came on to /me/. Fuckity fuck fuck fuck."  
  
Sora sighed exasperatedly, falling backward to lie down. "What am I supposed to do now? Pretend it didn't happen? Ignore it and hope it'll go away? I'm /not/ dating him. I'm /not/. Maybe I'll just have to stop..." But he didn't finish his sentence. He couldn't even /think/ that. Never would he leave Riku. Never again. They'd worked so hard to find each other, there was no way in hell he'd just forget about his friend like that. "But what should I do?"  
  
Sora lay there until the sun was almost down, thinking over his options, until he heard footsteps approach, hesitate, and continue. Sora looked up to see Riku trying to ignore him while getting into his boat. Sora wouldn't let him escape this time, and grabbed the older boy's hand as it started to untie the line.  
  
"Riku, wait."  
  
"Why? I thought you didn't want anything to do with me anymore."  
  
"No, that's not what I said!" Sora pleaded. "Please, just, let's talk about this, okay?"  
  
"I'm listening." Riku folded his arms over his chest, the venom in his eyes trying to hide the look of hurt hiding underneath.  
  
"Riku, we've been friends practically since we were born, right?" Riku nodded slowly. "Well, I've always just wanted to be friends, but you want to take it to another level and, frankly, I don't." Riku nodded again, averting his eyes. "But even so, I don't want to lose you, Riku. I still want to be friends. So, I'll pretend nothing was ever said, and we can go back to the way things were. That's all I want. It took six months for things to go back to normal between us, and now you say this - - It's too much. It's too much right now. I'm sorry if I've offended you or anything, but, please, let's just go back to normal. Please."  
  
Riku closed his eyes as he felt a slight shudder. When he looked back at Sora, silent tears were leaking from his eyes. "I'm sorry, Sora. I am /so/ sorry. For everything. I'm so much of a burden on you-"  
  
"You're /not/ a burden!" Sora protested, but Riku silenced him.  
  
"I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel like I can't just go on being your friend; not when I feel this way about you." He paused, rubbing an eye. "But, if it will make you happy, Sora, I'll try. I'll try to ignore what I feel. I'll try to be who I used to."  
  
Sora was stunned silent. He didn't know whether to agree or object. He settled for a quick nod before getting into his own boat.  
  
As they rowed home, the two boys wondered how they were going to trudge through the awkwardness between them now. Even if they tried to ignore them, the words had been said, and they couldn't be unsaid.  
  
+++  
  
I've always wanted to do a fic like this, with one-sided love. How would /you/ react if your best friend of the same/opposite (depending upon your gender preferences) told you they were in love with you? I think I'd act like Sora. Weird, upset, but not wanting to lose them.  
  
One-shot, don't ask for updates. Reviews make me happy, though, and make me write other stuff. Like 'My Moulin' and 'Writer's Poison' and 'Break Down'...  
  
In my dreams, I'm dying all the time.  
  
When I wake it's kaleidoscopic mind.  
  
I never meant to hurt you.  
  
I never meant to lie.  
  
So this is goodbye.  
  
This is goodbye.  
  
Tell the truth, you never wanted me.  
  
Tell me. 


End file.
